


A List of People Two-Face Has Kissed, in No Particular Order

by lizardhair



Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU, Gotham rogues - Fandom
Genre: F/M, Kissing, Light Angst, M/M, Not Beta Read, One Shot, this is harvey/every other character in the tags
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-15
Updated: 2018-08-15
Packaged: 2019-06-27 15:39:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15688392
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lizardhair/pseuds/lizardhair
Summary: Exactly what it says on the tin.





	A List of People Two-Face Has Kissed, in No Particular Order

_ Selina Kyle _

 

They were dating. They were  _ happy. _ They knew it couldn’t last. But neither Harvey nor Selina could have predicted how badly it would end. 

A kiss goodbye when he went to court that day.

Acid to the face.

A tender kiss through white bandages, the hospital room sterile and dim.

Mental break.  _ Two-Faced. _

He wept, kissing her. To his amazement, she cried too.

Violence. The coin.

A final kiss. “Goodbye, Harvey.”

 

* * *

  
  


_ Bruce Wayne _

 

_ Best friends forever... _ that was what Bruce had promised him. How young they had been. He had spent a week at Wayne Manor after Bruce’s parents were murdered. On his last day there, that was Bruce had pinky promised him. Best friends. Forever.

Years later, both in college. Or had it been high school? Either way, Bruce had thrown a party at the Manor. It was that game, Spin the Bottle, of all things. Of course they were both drunk. 

That didn’t mean it meant any less. They had kissed to applause and wolf-whistles, and it was the best night of Harvey’s life.

That is, until the next time they kissed.

 

* * *

  
  


_ The Riddler (Edward Nygma) _

 

God, he just wanted the green-suited genius to  _ shut up _ for  _ three minutes. _ Was that  _ really _ too much to ask? Technically, it was Harv who had kissed him, taking both Riddler and Harvey by surprise. Ed took it in stride, kissing back with more dexterity than Dent would have given him credit for.

 

It was not the last time that they kissed.

 

* * *

  
  
  


_ Batman _

 

This too had been Harv’s doing, but both facets of Dent’s mind had  _ wanted _ to do it. Just to throw the Dark Knight off-balance, of course. Nothing more. Not at all. And to Dent’s shock, it actually  _ worked. _ He’d thrown  _ Batman _ off of his game.  _ That _ would be worth bragging about in Arkham, at least.

_ But why, _ Harvey wondered,  _ had kissing the Bat felt so familiar? _

 

* * *

  
  


_ Joker _

 

This had been a mistake on everyone’s part. Joker had--of course--been the one to initiate the kiss, much to Dent’s displeasure. In the moment, he’d considered punching the clown, but had decided to hold back. 

What could he say? He was starved of human contact, and Joker was... _ probably _ human.

Perhaps the kiss hadn’t been a mistake so much as what came after. One thing led to another, and Two-Face ended up taking Joker back to one of his (lesser used) hideouts for the night. Dent woke up alone the next morning, feeling slap-happy and more than a little dirty.

 

* * *

  
  


_ Deathstroke _

 

Dent had liked the mercenary’s mask. Split down the middle into orange and obsidian, its design--and the mystery of the man behind it--had appealed to Two-Face too much for him to try to resist.

“Nice mask,” he said, sidling up to the out-of-towner.

“Nice suit,” Deathstroke responded.

“Of course it is,” Dent said. “I want the best this city has to offer.” He smirked. “Speaking of which, I’m in need of a new bodyguard. One that matches my particular...aesthetic.” Dent eyed Deathstroke up and down, making sure the mercenary saw where he was looking. “And I’ve gotta say, you  _ really _ fit the bill.”

Deathstroke laughed. “I don’t come cheap, you know.”

“That’s why I want you,” said Two-Face. “Let’s discuss over drinks. What do you say?”

They ended up doing more than drinking. Dent was relieved that he still found Deathstroke attractive without the mask--kissing him would have been rather awkward, otherwise. And after that first kiss, they ended up doing  _ much more. _

 

* * *

  
  


_ Harley Quinn (Harleen Quinzel) _

 

She’d dared him to do it. It was for reasons like that he hated Truth or Dare, a game which was only made worse by the fact that he had to flip his coin to decide between choosing “truth” or “dare” each round. But Harley had roped him into playing, and Dent was keen on keeping her as an ally. And knowing Harley, saying no to the game would have resulted in a year-long cold shoulder. He did not want that.

For whatever reason, the first time Dent chose dare, Harley had exclaimed,

“I dare ya to kiss me!”

“What?” he said, thinking he’d misheard. When Harley repeated herself, all Dent could think to say was “W-why?”

“‘Cause I’m curious! I wanna know if yer a good kisser,” Harley answered with a wink.”Now c’mon, pucker up!”

Their kiss was awkward, though not dispassionate. When they parted, Harley grinned.

“Ya ain’t half bad, Dent.”

 

* * *

  
  


_ Deadshot (Floyd Lawton) _

 

Without a doubt, this was Harvey’s strangest encounter. He’d gone to a speakeasy in the Narrows, where no one cared what a person looked like, and seen a somewhat-familiar face alone at the bar. Dent had sat down next to him and said,

“Well, well, well, what’s a married man like you doin’ in a place like this, huh?”

Deadshot jumped in his seat, then scowled. “Me an’ my girl were never married, Two-Face. She’s seein’ someone else now.” He took a swig of beer. “Another lady, in fact.”

“You don’t sound very happy for her.”

Deadshot was silent for a moment, then called to the bartender. “Get this man a whisky, if ya could.”

Dent’s smile was impish. “Do you always pay your therapists in liquor, Lawton?”

“Shaddup and drink, Dent.”

Dent drank, still smiling.

With a sigh, Floyd Lawton spoke. “I’m happy for her, yeah. I just...I still love her, even though I know she don’t want me to.” He took another swill of beer. “Which is fair, honestly ‘nough.”

“You just weren’t right for each other,” Two-Face said, patting Lawton on the shoulder. “That’s how it is, sometimes.” He chuckled. “Besides, a guy like you shouldn’t have any trouble finding a new girl.”

“Did’n know you were such a flatterer, Two-Face,” Deadshot said. His words were beginning to slur together. He looked over at Dent. “Hey, this migh’ be a bit weird, but d’you mind if I try sumthin’?”

“...What is it?” Dent asked.

“This,” said Deadshot, leaning over and pressing his lips to Dent’s in a gentle kiss.

Two-Face was too surprised to move. He sat, frozen, as Lawton pulled away and stood up.

“Yeah,” Deadshot said. “That’s ‘bout what I thought. Thanks, Dent.”

With that, he vanished into the crowd, leaving Two-Face confused and just a little aroused.

**Author's Note:**

> Multishipping is fun
> 
> So is making your own canon
> 
> @lizard-hair on tumblr ;)


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